The mystery of photos

This is my grandparent´s farm on Senja, an island in the north of Norway. My grandfather stands beside the house. He was working with timber and buildings, and built this house and lawn with his own hands. My grandmother stands on the left side close to the little road leading up to the house. She bore seven children, three died as infants. They both got to be over 90 years old before they went over.

This is a glimpse into another reality.

I took a serial of photos using myself as a model. It was strange to look at the diversity of looks, the light, the expressions on the face. Looking at me from the outside gave me a feeling of strangeness, usually I look at the world from the inside, and it is other people´s judgement and reactions that tells me about myself. This woman, myself, now 55 years old, lived on the farm above when she was five. She ate rhubarbs in the garden and ran on the road visiting the neighbor´s boy almost every day, to play.

It is a time so long ago, I can hardly remember it at all. 

The Miranda tale

I´m working on my graphic novel "The Inner Monster". This is a fantasy tale. To analyze the Jackson film of The Lord of the Rings should give me some insights in how this works. Why fantasy? What psychological needs are being met?
I heard someone say that some people does not have a inner voice in their heads. That shocked me. The inner voice that speaks to me, my voice, is vital to my happiness and comfort. It tells me the Ingalill story, the tale that is created just for me, it structures my experiences and explain them. It speaks my logic, which sometimes don´t compares with the official outer world logic at all. The outer world has quite strict rules: the reality must be something we all can agree upon. This consensus bind us to each other, but can be misused. Think about the frames of christianity in its negative aspects, or communism. You cannot, or should not press your own world view upon others, but it is done all the time.
Fantasy literature do not have so rigid bonds. It can write about the world as you think it should be, or fear it could be. I find fantasy to be a road to freedom. The only borders are my own limit.

In the Inner Monster I´ll try to describe the loss of trust. What makes some people to become monsters in the eye of society? Fritzl, Bundy, Mengele, sometime they must have had a choice to become something other than sadists. What stories did they tell themselves? Were there any stories at all?

Lord of the Rings -my precious ...

Illustration by Alan Lee: Orthanc, the tower in Isengaard

For five days I´ve looked at the stuff on the special extended edition DVD box of the Lotr films by Pete Jackson and his fabulous crew. Wow, what a work! I´m too close still to come up with any art critic. The spirit behind the film-making, however, is easy to say something about. What love. And heroic bravery in taking it on and going through with it. My sincere respect to Peter Jackson for daring to push everything to it´s limits, and insisting upon fine details as well as gigantic scenes.
That speaks about real love given freely, and not bought love.
I´m going to look more, and I´m going to write about it. Just knowing about the beautiful miniatures and the big miniatures they built, make me awed when I look at the scenery in the films, many many highlights: Helm´s Deep, Isengaard, Lothlorien, Minas Tirith, The Black Gates, The City of the Dead. Fantastic.

I think Jackson did the absolutely right thing in inviting Alan Lee and John Howe, the two famous Tolkien- illustrators, to design the film. It was the link to the past the film needed. Their knowledge was invaluable. And thanks to those two, that they said yes, and joined.